I always look forward to shopping, it highlights the whole of the week.
Pushing a trolley 'round Woolies, and cursing the people I meet.
Parking is usually a hassle unless I am first through the gate,
but then I’m a little too early and boredom sets in while I wait.

After much cursing and swearing I finally get into the store,
and pick out the best of the trolleys from a stack just inside the door.
Then, like a racing car driver I go to my place on the grid
to commence the tactical battle, against Man, Woman, trolley and Kid.

Down passed the soaps and detergents and the place where the Kellogs are packed,
to the bread, the muffins and crumpets and the bench where the eggs are all stacked.
As I rounded the Vegemite corner, a lady stepped into my line
I sideswiped her legs with my trolley and buckled the frozen goods sign.

The wheels of my trolley both wobble and to steer, it takes all of my might
like some of our great politicians, not sure to go left or to right.
I battle the crowd at the deli, and make my way back to the top
then down the long straight near the checkouts and in for a scheduled pit stop.

By this time I’m feeling exhausted, with half of my shopping complete,
I still have to buy all the veges and still have to purchase the meat.
I look to the queue at the checkouts in hope I can find a shortcut.
No way can I find a quick exit, cause some of the checkouts are shut.

So still the challenge continues my patience is put to the test
I stayed in the line for an hour and waited along with the rest.
By this time the chickens are thawing, the ice cream is melting away,
and to make matters worse, at the checkout, they told me to have a nice day.

When I finally completed the shopping and filled up the car with my load,
I had to go back into action and battle the clowns on the road.
Finally at home feeling weary with battle scars, bruises and pain.
I vow to myself and my family, I’ll never go shopping again.

Copyright © M C Lyons